Monday, January 15, 2007

A Few Little Points to Ponder (III)

Just a few more little points to ponder...

A 12-year old labrador retriever is one of the best pets to have with small children. I can't think of any other dog that would allow a 2-year old to hold their leash and take them for a walk. However, if our 12-year old dog doesn't stop eating her own poop, despite the nutritionally balanced food that she is served up twice a day, and the gourmet dog cookies that she receives after every walk ... I'll be sending her to live in the country.

If our children weren't so adorable, I probably would have consumed them by now. Especially when we spent an entire weekend cleaning the house and within seconds of finishing the huge job, our children enthusiastically rubbed their peanut butter and banana sandwich all over the table top and bottom. They then rubbed that same peanut butter and banana sandwich, that they somehow managed to sneak away from the table, all over the walls. And the floor. And the doorways in our hall.

Having a picnic at the local park, at least one meal a day, might be the smartest thing I've ever thought up. Not only do the children love sitting at a picnic table and eating their lunch outdoors, our kitchen table and floors, and walls, and doorways, and chairs stays clean. Since we live in San Diego where the weather is almost always mild - I just might take to eating at the park every single meal of every single day. I'll slap some wheels on my old dormitory refrigerator and fasten our camping stove to the top. Or, we could just eat peanut butter every day. That's what we do, anyway.

Sometimes, I have more patience than others. Sometimes, I have no patience at all. I don't know what happens to it - or where it goes - but it will literally vanish in to thin air just like the 3-dozen Nestle Toll House chocolate chip cookies Charlie made less than two days ago. I find myself scratching my head and wondering "What happened to all that patience I had a minute ago...?!? I REALLY NEED IT RIGHT NOW." I've decided that unending patience when you have 3-2 year olds is an essential characteristic. Quite likely, the most important one of all. Especially when two of your three children hack open the childproof locks and simultaneously, dump two full boxes of rice, one white - one brown, all over the kitchen floor. And rather than staying at home and cleaning up the mess that they've made, you decide to take the whole lot of them, by yourself, to the park. And while at the park - they take off running in three different directions, while your totally deaf dog takes off running in the fourth direction ... and you stand paralyzed wondering who is in the most peril and who should I rescue first?!"

A 12-year old labrador retriever with an insatiable appetite is a valuable companion when you enjoy a picnic with 2-year old triplets. Whatever food the kids do not eat, and take to throwing all over creation, is quickly consumed by the dog and you don't feel like a total slob walking away from peanut butter sandwich squares littering the ground. Molly is my portable Animal. Now, if she could just stop wedging down her own fecal matter, we'll be set.

I've heard that God never gives you more than you can handle. With three toddlers and another baby on the way, I've decided that God must really trust me. Sometimes, I wonder if He trusts me a little too much. Maybe He knows that I won't eat them.

Taking on a task like painting the inside of the house with three toddlers underfoot, just might qualify Charlie and I as clinically insane.

Although we've only been giving the kids baths every other night, I think the time is ripe to initiate bath night, every night. Especially when the children find no greater joy than walking on their hands and standing on their head everytime we go out in public. Why is it that they choose to do this move when we are in the nastiest of locations? Like, say, a basketball court that is littered with partially digested sunflower seeds, or, the restroom at the zoo?

Now for some semantics. The word "wine" is music to my ears. Hearing a child "whine" for more than an hour straight, makes me want to grab a bottle of wine and drink the whole damn thing. Over the past four months, our "House Wine" has changed from Cabernet Sauvignon ... to "Maaammmmaaa!!" It is especially challenging that about the time I had to stop enjoying wine in the evening - our children's primary vehicle for communication during the day, is hanging on my leg(s) and moaning words which I do not understand.

Returning to work last week, after almost a month off, it's safe to say I missed our children more than I ever have before. Sure, the job of a mother is grueling and at times, down right excruciatingly painful. But, I'm convinced that there is no better job in the whole entire world. Especially when your three toddlers, who a mere year ago could barely walk ... run to catch up with you and hold your hand at the park when you wave "BYE BYE!" and walk in the opposite direction - praying desperately to God that they follow. Or, when they do their absolute best to jump and throw the ball through a basketball hoop. Or, when you lay down on a blanket and the three of them pile on top of you ... and looking in to their perfectly happy and smiling little faces, you cannot make a distinction between the beautiful blue sky above ... and the eyes of your children.


  1. You're kids are totally adorable. And I must agree that if my kids weren't so adorable too, I would have consumed them --when nobody was looking!

  2. You need the magnet locks! They are GREAT! They even keep me out of the cabinets at times (great diet tool!) The cheapest place I have seen them is Babies R' Us. You get 4 locks and a Magnet key for $19.99. When you have three minds working together, this is the only solution (to your sanity!)

  3. good thing they're cute!

  4. I have to agree with cathy on those magnet locks! They are great, if you don't lose the magnet key! When are we going to see you guys????

  5. I just posted a comment on Cathy's blog and told her that we HAVE the magnetic locks. Our little stinkers got a hold of the magnet and while one held the magnet over the lock - the other one pulled the door open. When I heard the rice spill, one was still holding the lock - the other two were holding empty boxes of rice with smirks on their faces.

    They're just as devious as they are brilliant.

    I don't know if they just got lucky, or if they truly figured out the locking system. It wouldn't surprise me if they figured it out. I swore William was trying to access the internet and update my blog this morning....

  6. Jen, I just caught up on the last few posts. The portraits turned out great!!!! I can also identify with your dog issues...we have a lab,too...but she is 3--ARGH!
    And as for the chocolate/pb cravings I have those too--and am not even pg!
    Fun reading!!!

  7. I wavered back and forth between thinking "oh, I want me some triplets" and "ohmigod how does this woman MANAGE?"

    So, in the end, I've decided to just wish you good luck and go on my merry way. They are awfully cute, though. Maybe I could babysit?

  8. I have a 3 year old lab and she is soooo good with our little one. They are the best with kids!

    Although I'm not sure my lab would let a 2 year old walk her, but maybe when she is 14.

    I also wanted to ask you how the heck you cross out your words? I love that!

  9. we have the magnet locks too. They are really close to figuring them out! They know where the key is and they know to put it on the cabinet. They just haven't been very lucky at finding the correct spot to open them....thank god!!

    I love your post though. It's such an internal battle that we all go through with staying at home vs. working. It sounds like you have a good balance.

    The dog sounds wonderful just like our 12 year old rottweiler was. He would have definitely let the boys walk them. Brittney could do anything to him. Sadly though the boys never got the chance to meet him and we still haven't gotten another dog to replace him (and never will).