tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post3594244190959751557..comments2024-03-27T19:04:31.290-05:00Comments on The Amazing Trips: finding graceThe Amazing Tripshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13761348688069779544noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-50213756781781358652008-07-31T19:53:00.000-05:002008-07-31T19:53:00.000-05:00I went through something very similar with my four...I went through something very similar with my four year old son -I swore that he would never be potty trained. I was very frustrated with him and my self. But I realized my frustration was leading me to always point out his mistakes, his "bad attitude", etc... It was about a month into our training that I realized I had to change and decided to start recongnize all the good things he was doing, all the hugs he gave everyone, all the love he freely gave. When I started doing that a change occured in both of us and he was potty trained in less than a week. <BR/><BR/>Good luck with your Grace - she is beautiful child who will eventually potty trained! :0)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-31537791217459556982008-07-31T05:56:00.000-05:002008-07-31T05:56:00.000-05:00This post makes me think of my parents. They had ...This post makes me think of my parents. They had twin boys when I was 11. They worked very hard to treat us kids fairly. In their minds, what that meant was treat us the same. We got the same amount of attention, the same type of discipline, the same everything. In spite of the fact that they were boys, I was a girl, they were little and I was a preteen. It was probably one of the biggest mistakes they ever made with me growing up, because I am not my brothers. I needed different attention (more and quality), I needed to be disciplined differently (not screamed at or spanked), and I needed to be communicated with differently (gentle encouragement, not patronized).<BR/><BR/>I have seen my parents a handful of times in the last 18 years. I don't miss them. I don't really want to see them. They still have no idea why treating me the same as the twins resulted in a very different relationship now that we're adults. Yes, we're all their kids, but we're not the same.<BR/><BR/>I'm so glad to read that you already realize that.AWhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07976537861843058177noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-50720389332275290362008-07-30T07:05:00.000-05:002008-07-30T07:05:00.000-05:00I think you're doing the right thing by keeping he...I think you're doing the right thing by keeping her in diapers full time... It is THE ONLY THING that worked for my daughter. <BR/><BR/>One day, when she was about three and a half, she decided that she didn't want to wear diapers anymore and that was that. Much to my surprise, she was fully trained within a few days. <BR/><BR/>Hang in there, she'll come around!Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09294618330890288284noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-46095118054049791802008-07-30T02:18:00.000-05:002008-07-30T02:18:00.000-05:00potty training....shudder....God bless you! I crie...potty training....shudder....God bless you! I cried every day I potty trained my first born. Little did I realize how easy he was going to be compared to my last 2... <BR/>Keeping your daughter up reminds me of the countless "good ideas" that just ended up with me being incredibly guilt ridden.holly whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10330225563028611599noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-27552220846816446742008-07-29T23:00:00.000-05:002008-07-29T23:00:00.000-05:00http://www.motherhoodwithattitude.com/cards/front/...http://www.motherhoodwithattitude.com/cards/front/potty_front.jpg<BR/><BR/><BR/>:) It'll be ok.. <BR/><BR/>...and I hope this makes you laugh (not cry) that I found this as I was clicking through your old posts:<BR/><BR/>http://amazingtrips.blogspot.com/2006/12/beginning-of-end.html<BR/><BR/>Good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-57029939202325043952008-07-29T18:55:00.000-05:002008-07-29T18:55:00.000-05:00The more I think about Gracie my heart aches for ...The more I think about Gracie my heart aches for her. She does not want to hang on but she does not know how to let go. She needs you more than the others now. Please do not embarrass her and please, please tell her you are sorry for anything you may have done to hurt her. I am going thru this with my oldest daughter now, and I have apologized to her over and over and she is not ready to forgive me. Perhaps in my case it was toilet training to early. I am thinking of you and Gracie and sending energy. <BR/>NONIAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-35736577226670598342008-07-29T18:43:00.000-05:002008-07-29T18:43:00.000-05:00Carolyn Grace with the beautiful face. How loving...Carolyn Grace with the beautiful face. How lovingly you looked at her and was so happy with her. Do not let it get you down Jen--why don't you go to see someone who is impartial in helping you deal with this problem. I go and it is a tremendous help and another way to look at things. Think about it!<BR/>MOMAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-50765501299139969942008-07-29T13:03:00.000-05:002008-07-29T13:03:00.000-05:00Hey Jenna-I've only heard great reviews about this...Hey Jenna-<BR/>I've only heard great reviews about this!<BR/>http://www.pottytrainingsecretsexposed.com/Offer.html?hop=shayna21<BR/><BR/>--LorieGeologychickhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05326271846932273163noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-12222213482960998392008-07-29T12:55:00.000-05:002008-07-29T12:55:00.000-05:00Also a lurker. I've only been at this for 8 month...Also a lurker. I've only been at this for 8 months with triplets, but have also had a couple of moments that I am not proud of. Sometimes we have to try things to find out they don't work, though. My little girl is our "difficult" one. I've been frustrated with her over various eating, sleeping, and crying issues. But she's also the one with the biggest smile, the biggest laugh, and the sweetest spirit. I often wonder how on earth I'm supposed to get all of this right. How on earth am I supposed to raise these babies while dealing with my own frustrations and shortcomings. No one tells you about this part of motherhood, huh? <BR/><BR/>Here's hoping that we get at least most of it right...learn from our mistakes...and don't become alcoholics in the meantime....The Rogers Tripletshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01433668215768122160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-51497486202224959492008-07-29T12:51:00.000-05:002008-07-29T12:51:00.000-05:00If it makes you feel anybetter I have potty traine...If it makes you feel anybetter I have potty trained six kids, and I was reduced to tears by all of them. I thought by the time I got to the youngest ones I'd have a working technique, but they all needed different things and had thier own timetables.<BR/><BR/>Hooray for two kids potty trained!Karlahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01201781127041417410noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-80327843459482259222008-07-29T11:58:00.000-05:002008-07-29T11:58:00.000-05:00I imagine this is one of the hardest with multiple...I imagine this is one of the hardest with multiples - there is always at least one or two other children of the exact same age and developmental background to compare one with. It's difficult enough not to do it with siblings in general! Just remember their similiarities end with their birthdate, and that's how it should be.<BR/><BR/>Breathe, love her. So much regressive behvior goes away so quickly with even the tiniest bit of "extra" TLC. (Where you can come up with the energy to provide that? I have no idea! Dreyer's?) Dig deep. Let her cling. Let her wear diapers. Let her be herself. You'll all find Grace that way. :)<BR/><BR/>In the meantime, I'm cheering for you!Code Yellow Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16283426654179102400noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-42465552009936905002008-07-29T10:16:00.000-05:002008-07-29T10:16:00.000-05:00I think your decision to put her back in diapers w...I think your decision to put her back in diapers was a good one. You definitely realized that whatever you're trying, isn't working. Carolyn sounds to me like a free spirit, similar to my 5 (almost 6 year old). As they say, "Pick your battles"<BR/><BR/>I had issues with her and going poop too, but I only had her. She wasn't so much afraid of the poop itself, she was afraid of the act of it coming out. We would sit and read books with her on the toilet to help her calm down. Sometimes it worked. A friend of mine had her son just sit and play his Leapster on the toilet, to help him relax.<BR/><BR/>It will happen, but it will happen on her time, unfortunately for you.<BR/><BR/>Hang in there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Tinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08635083407685681890noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-80297467265735627232008-07-29T09:24:00.000-05:002008-07-29T09:24:00.000-05:00I have also had moments where I have not been prou...I have also had moments where I have not been proud of myself as a mother. I kick myself hard too because I WANTED these children so badly (which I know you feel the same) I should love every minute of it, right? We are not perfect, and it teaches our children how to come back from imperfection. They can learn that they too can have a second chance (at least most of the time). Things always look better in the morning than they do at 12am. I'm sympathizing with you and I will keep notes for when my 3 are ready (or not ready) for potty training.<BR/><BR/>You are a great mom and your kids will remember some bad times (who doesn't?) but there are a whole lot more good times.<BR/><BR/>CadiCadi + 4https://www.blogger.com/profile/12226644184897119722noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-4950271232456773952008-07-29T08:49:00.000-05:002008-07-29T08:49:00.000-05:00What mother hasn't felt like this at some time? I ...What mother hasn't felt like this at some time? I often find myself locked in a battle of wills with my two-year-old daughter that later makes me say, "Why couldn't I find a graceful way out of that?"<BR/><BR/>I keep reminding myself that my child's strong-willed nature will serve her well in this harsh world. <BR/><BR/>I also pray that perhaps not ALL of the triplets on the way will be quite as strong willed as Amelia!<BR/><BR/>All things in good time, Jen, and in the meantime, plenty of grace!<BR/><BR/>Christy<BR/><BR/>www.trippin-lifewithtriplets.blogspot.comChristy AKA Trippin' Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16281841454592589174noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-70783451697471346922008-07-29T08:11:00.000-05:002008-07-29T08:11:00.000-05:00I am normally a lurker, but just had to comment. I...I am normally a lurker, but just had to comment. I really enjoy your blog!! This was such a touching post. <BR/><BR/>I have no words of wisdom to offer you, especially since it seems like you have heard them all :) I just want to say that I think that being a mother is difficult beyond words sometimes. Hang in there!!<BR/><BR/>RobinRobinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08887497673970856308noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-39068570737688621872008-07-29T02:29:00.000-05:002008-07-29T02:29:00.000-05:00Some children have a real "thing" about pooping. ...Some children have a real "thing" about pooping. It is fear, and I believe it is very real. I think your decision to put it aside and put her in diapers for a while, with nothing said about her pooping habits will do wonders.<BR/><BR/>I've know several children who carried this aversion to using the toilet when they pooped. One nephew asked his mother to put a diaper on him when he needed to do his business. She always did and he continued going to the corner of his bedroom, doing it, and then asked to be put back in his big boy underwear!! He was 5 before it stopped. Really, in the total scheme of things, what difference did it make?<BR/><BR/>My eyes welled up with tears for you...and for little Gracie..How well do I remember the feeling of going to bed after being impatient with my kids--it causes pain like a knife, and further more, it makes a very heavy heart.<BR/><BR/>I'm glad you are purposing to practice grace with her--"grace"--that which we don't deserve--oh that we would all practice more grace in our day to day lives!<BR/><BR/> You will get through this, my dear. Don't doubt yourself--God will give you the grace and patience as you practice using them for His glory.<BR/><BR/>God chose you to mother this little group and God doesn't make mistakes. He also knows your frailties and He understands!<BR/><BR/>Well, lest I take the liberty to do a sermon, I must stop.<BR/><BR/>You have people praying for you and for the children.<BR/><BR/>You are blessed.<BR/><BR/>Joana portland grannyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13675027205217905283noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-2933582502842395882008-07-29T00:44:00.000-05:002008-07-29T00:44:00.000-05:00As a mom, regrets are going to happen. It's what ...As a mom, regrets are going to happen. It's what you do with it that counts. Potty training is hard work...on both of you. There's no sense constantly upsetting both of you. I agree she will go when she is ready. I'm sure it will be soon. I think some one on one time will be good for both of you. Good luck.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-80826442995949316532008-07-29T00:16:00.000-05:002008-07-29T00:16:00.000-05:00I felt a little teary, for you reminded me of the ...I felt a little teary, for you reminded me of the time I needed extra grace with our Mia Grace. Not over potty training, but a extremely busy, frustrating toddlerhood. <BR/><BR/>Saying a prayer for you tonight for extra patience and calmness this week.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-2416256370701087692008-07-28T23:49:00.000-05:002008-07-28T23:49:00.000-05:00Jen, this post made me cry. Amanda has always bee...Jen, this post made me cry. Amanda has always been more difficult and it's always been a struggle for me to show her grace and I have felt at many many times that I've been less than the person I should be with her. <BR/><BR/>I have tried very very hard to stop thinking of her as the "stubborn" one or the "hard" one or the "jealous" one (which she is, truly) and when my attitude changed towards her, her attitude changed. I haven't thought of her as those things for awhile now. <BR/><BR/>I think you should tell Carolyn you are sorry about Thursday night and tell her that you guys are going to do it different now. It's amazing to me how telling Amanda how sorry I am changed our relationship. <BR/><BR/>And I truly think going to school is going to be a big help for her. I really do. It's helped Amanda immensely. <BR/><BR/>I'd give you a cyber hug if I didn't think those were stupid. I think you are on the right track now. She'll be potty trained in the first week of September. You watch.Michele Shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15061520456909635254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-23168155919419238442008-07-28T23:20:00.000-05:002008-07-28T23:20:00.000-05:00Erica: unfortunately, Gracie has NO desire to go t...Erica: unfortunately, Gracie has NO desire to go to Montessori school. She sat in on a class a few months ago and wouldn't let me leave her side. While Elizabeth and William loved being in a class by themselves, Gracie couldn't wait to leave. <BR/><BR/>So ... telling her that she can't go to school until she goes poop in the potty may actually make my situation worse!!The Amazing Tripshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13761348688069779544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-66298637759852584512008-07-28T23:19:00.000-05:002008-07-28T23:19:00.000-05:00Good for you. For trying everything, for laying i...Good for you. For trying everything, for laying it all bare when the lowest low came, and for stepping back and seeing what should come next.<BR/><BR/>Sounds like the right solution to me.All Things BDhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15471290940963547810noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-18423443493973888202008-07-28T23:01:00.000-05:002008-07-28T23:01:00.000-05:00I love your final words and meaning of this post J...I love your final words and meaning of this post Jen. I have always loved the name Grace...and I'm glad that you are finding ways to share your own grace on your strong-willed girl.Casey's triohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00642538674985608613noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-10227449301207464232008-07-28T22:58:00.000-05:002008-07-28T22:58:00.000-05:00I was kinda wondering what happened this weekend?!...I was kinda wondering what happened this weekend?! JK. Anyway, I am sorry about all that. You do what you have to do in the moment...and you did. I don't fault you. You sound like me with my 3 year old...I hope it doesn't come to that but it just might if he doesn't start soon. <BR/><BR/>Hang in there and I think you have the right perspective now...lots of love and grace...:) Good luck.Courtneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12957994275054972253noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-24368561491302351662008-07-28T22:38:00.000-05:002008-07-28T22:38:00.000-05:00My oldest son, who has always thought well above h...My oldest son, who has always thought well above his years, just was NOT going to be told where and when to poop. I stopped putting his naptime diaper on because he would hold it until I did. Then, he started holding it until his nightime diaper, which I eventually took. Then, I qualified for the bad mother award when he got horribly constipated. The dr. told me that it was better to let him manipulate me than to have him constipated. "sigh" I couldn't argue with the dr. and hated seeing him scream in pain when I finally did have to give in and give him the diaper! I have sat on the floor in the bathroom and cried for hours...like you...just waiting. <BR/>It finally happened, but only when Patrick decided that HE was ready. Of all the things that I have been through with parenting, potty training Patrick has been the worst. I so know what you are going through.Sherrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02594907511544202220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-24756113.post-25650074363625651082008-07-28T22:04:00.000-05:002008-07-28T22:04:00.000-05:00My little guy is not quite 1.5 yet, but I just wan...My little guy is not quite 1.5 yet, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm praying for grace for you.Sharonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10517064064201085084noreply@blogger.com